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Nicole Sodoma wears a multitude of hats: mom of three; founder and managing principal of Sodoma Law with four offices in the Carolinas; divorce attorney with 20+ years of family law experience; board member and volunteer for several community organizations.
With the 2022 publication of Please Don’t Say You’re Sorry, Nicole can add Author to her growing list of contributions to our local community and to the national conversation around family law and divorce.
Equal parts straightforward advice, friendly encouragement, and wise memoir, Please Don’t Say You’re Sorry is all about choice—from the choice to remain married or to separate, to the smaller choices along the way and what the consequences of those choices look like. Nicole positions herself as a trustworthy ally for anyone faced with these choices, and she’s got the personal and professional experience to back up her advice.
If you’re looking for concrete tools, you’ll appreciate that each chapter ends with Tough Questions (a series of considerations to tackle as you make the journey toward reconciliation or divorce) and Technically Speaking (action items based on the topics covered in each chapter). There’s also a Glossary of Simplified Legal Speak, where Nicole demystifies frequently used terms like “verified pleading” and “arbitration” to empower her readers and ready them for the journey ahead.
If you’re looking for entertainment and some good old-fashioned storytelling, Nicole’s got that covered as well. Her stories, both personal and professional, will leave anyone who’s going through a rocky period feeling less alone and more equipped to face challenges head-on. Having gone through a divorce herself and guided countless clients through the ups and downs of ending one chapter and starting a new one, Nicole’s empathy nearly jumps off the page.
‘Sorry’, a word used to express empathy for someone’s misfortune, hardly seems fitting for a circumstance where you are choosing to do what is in the best interest of your happiness (and perhaps that of your partner and children too).
Is this book strictly for the nearly-divorced or the soon-to-be separated? Not at all. In fact, one of the most universally helpful parts of the book is in the title. Nicole delves into the loaded word “sorry,” helping us consider the reasons we say it, who we say it to, and how we interpret the word when people say it to us. She recalls being “seated in a symphony of sympathies” when she separated after thirteen years of marriage.
“Why is it that people say ‘I’m sorry’ when we divorce?” writes Nicole. “‘Sorry, a word used to express empathy for someone’s misfortune, hardly seems fitting for a circumstance where you are choosing to do what is in the best interest of your happiness (and perhaps that of your partner and children too).”
After encouraging her readers to rethink “sorry” as a response to news of a marriage ending, Nicole generously offers a list of alternatives that convey empathy, hope, and support. This list is one of many takeaways that put Please Don’t Say You’re Sorry firmly in the “must-read” category for anyone seeking an empowering perspective on marriage, divorce, and everything in between.
Want to know more about Nicole Sodoma and Sodoma Law? You’ll enjoy our fun, and candid, conversation on The Best of LKN Podcast.